University Visit
by Temporal Austenite
Summary: River doesn't mind the Doctor's surprise visits, but she's going to shoot the Daleks if they mess up her exam schedule...My thanks to the 1000 visitors to my stories last month! Please read and review! Rather AU as of Let's Kill Hitler...Thanks Moffat!
1. Chapter 1

_This is part one of my thanks to my 1000+ visitors last month. Once again, thank you to everybody who read my stories, is reading this story, as well as the unsung heros of reviews, favoriting and story alerting!_

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><p>"What are we doing?" River cried, as the Doctor rounded a corner, dragging her along behind him.<p>

"Stopping." He replied, stepping into a classroom and closing the door. He turned away without even bothering to lock it—not that a lock would have done much.

"We _can't_ stop—those are _daleks_. They want us _dead_."

"Meh," he grinned, "I've been through worse."

"No offence sweetie, but you don't have the best track record of survival!" She shot back.

"And I thought that this would be about running! We'd get in trouble and run away! That's what we did last time."

"Last time was your mother. And no offense River, but your mother is frightful when she's upset, and that was her best china. And her flower bed." She watched him as he waved his sonic around the room.

"You _would_ land on mum's flower bed. She's going to kill you."

"Which is why I'm more worried about her than the daleks. Do you know how many times I've faced them?" He examined the results and placed the screwdriver back into his pocket.

"Enough to regenerate 10 times!"

"Those were not all because of daleks. I have been shot by daleks…twice. And not once did I die. Good at surviving, that's me." He grinned, "Not the ultimate one. I know a man who can't die."

"Then why did you regenerate?"

"Saving you lot. It's an awful lot of work. One time I caught a disease. Well. Like a disease. Practically a disease. Really deadly without an antidote. Well. You can guess what happened. Then there's always radiation poisoning. I hate that. And falling…have you ever fallen from a scaffold?" She gave him a look, "No. Right. Sorry. But look, my deaths haven't been really violent. I don't die by getting shot."

"Why aren't we running?" She asked, following him around her history class room.

"Because, River Song, I don't run." He picked up a piece of chalk and started to draw on the board, large circular symbols.

"What is it that you're doing?" She snapped. She had sat down on her desk (the professor had placed her in the front of the classroom because he thought she was up to something. It wasn't her fault she got bored and read the entire history book the week after the semester started.) "And you do to run. You always run."

"I'm leaving them an offer. They can leave immediately or else."

"Or else what? What can you do to daleks?"

"I will destroy their entire fleet."

"And how do you plan on doing that?" She asked, crossing her legs and leaning forward.

"Don't know yet, but I'll think of something. I usually do." He turned around, "And I don't always run. Well. I do. But sometimes you have to stop or you'll run forever. The point of running is to have something to run to. Running from stuff can occupy your time for a while, but at some point, you have to run to a place or a person or it isn't worth living longer."

"We can't defeat the daleks in my college history classroom!"

"No. We won't. Tell me, how far up are we?"

"Three stories."

"Hmm. I guess we'll be going up then." He reached into his pockets, searching. "Oh, this, by the way, is yours. You told me you lost it and to give you a new one you next time." He tossed it in the air to her with surprisingly good aim.

"What is it? Why are you giving me…" she opened the tube, "Lipstick?"

He was in the middle of pulling out a length of rope, "You are such a sneak! I hate you sometimes, do you know that? You can't just decide you want something and make me give it to you. You are a sneak! And don't smile, it's not funny." He paused, "I'm talking to your future self, right now, so remember this lecture when I see you," he checked his watch, "in a few days. Spoilers, though. That, my dear, is your hallucinogenic lipstick. Kissing people makes them do your bidding."

She grinned, "You shouldn't have."

"No, I shouldn't have River, and it is your fault I did. I hope you feel thoroughly chastised."

"Entirely. Now, what are we doing?"

"Climbing up to the fourth floor." He threw the hook out the window, smashing the one above inward. "Ladies first?"

"You just want to look at my butt," She teased at him as she climbed up.

"Shut up."

"Knew it!" She called down as she shimmed up the rope and swung the window open.

"Still shut up!" He replied, pulling himself in clumsily. "Right. So. Now, all we have to do is wait for them to call."

"Call?"

"I gave them your cell phone number." He winked, "I'll pay to have the number changed, don't worry."

"Mum and dad were really upset about that the first time!" She complained. "I know. Spoilers. But don't try it again. You have a cell phone. Give them yours."

"Give the Daleks, my most powerful enemy my cell phone number? What sort of sense does that make?"

"It saves me some trouble and makes me feel grateful that you would put your life at risk for me?" She batted her eyelashes.

"Remember what I said about shutting up?"

"Make me." She shot back as her phone rang. "You'd be the Daleks then. I know you want to talk to him. Honestly, give me a second." She hit a button on her phone, "You're on speaker. Say hello love."

"DOCTOR."

"Hello, you worthless wastes of space." The Doctor said, almost pleasantly. There was an edge to his voice that could have cut diamonds, and River could see the look in his eyes. "That's the deal. Take it or leave it."

"WE WILL DESTROY THE HUMAN RACE."

"Did you boys wake up on the wrong side of the bed this morning?"

"WHO ELSE IS THERE?"

"I'm River Song." She answered, ignoring the Doctor's pointed eye-roll. "And if you don't get out of my school, I will bloody kill you."

There was a pause on the other end. "WE WILL RECONSIDER."

"Thanks so much for calling!" River hung up the phone. "What did I ever do to them?"

"Spoilers." He tapped her nose. "And it's not just you. They like to be all bluff and bluster in front of me, but you and me, we're unstoppable."

"Don't I know it." She wrapped her arms around his neck, and was interrupted by a loud noise. "They're outside the window, aren't they?"

"One is."

She turned and pulled a gun out of her waist and shot it in the eye stalk.

"Good, you've damaged it. Now, I suggest we run."

"You don't want me killing it?" She asked as they raced out the door and down the hallway.

"Not right now. You need to save your ammunition. When did you start carrying that around with you, by the way? And how does your father feel about it?"

"Spoilers." She grinned, "I do so like that word. And dad's currently fine with it. But he blames you."

"What'd I do? How did I do anything to make you get a gun?"

"You're the one who gave me the vortex manipulator. Don't spoiler me, Doctor, because it's not a spoiler. It's a birthday wishlist."

He grinned, "You do have a way of getting things out of me, don't you?"

"Daddy always said I have my boys wrapped around my finger." She winked, "And I do so love surprise gifts."

"I like giving them to you. I suppose telling you that a vortex manipulator would have been for school, not for gift- buying wouldn't do any good?"

"Oh, you know me."

"Yes." He grinned dramatically, "Incorrigible."

"I was thinking something a bit different." She laughed.

He pretended to look confused for a second, then said, "Pig headed?"

"I hate you."

"You really don't."

"THE DOCTOR HAS BEEN LOCATED." A voice said behind them, "THE DOCTOR AND RIVER SONG WILL STOP."

"Not likely." She turned around to fire a shot, but the Doctor pushed her gun down.

"Still thinking over your decision?" He called over to them. "If I were you, I'd be in your silly little ships and flying off already. I'm not happy right now. I don't plan to get mad for a while. But currently I am very, very angry."

"THE DOCTOR AND RIVER SONG WILL FOLLOW."

"Sweetie, I adore you, and you must understand that. But here's the issue. I really, really hate them. I'm going to shoot something very soon, and I'd prefer it wasn't you." She hissed.

"THE DOCTOR AND RIVER SONG WILL FOLLOW." The dalek insisted.

The Doctor winked at her, "You won't shoot me."

"I will slap you."

He flinched, and turned back to the dalek. "Right. If I were you, I'd phrase that as a request. And not one of those 'I'd follow it if you want to live' sort, because I'm sure you do want to live. I also wouldn't recommend any phrases like "I would sooner die than" because she really believes in saying what you mean." He paused, "Unless it's her."

"Shut up."

"River, stop proving my point." He tapped her nose.

"WOULD THE DOCTOR AND RIVER SONG PLEASE FOLLOW?" The dalek asked, either frightened, clever, or both.

"That's better, isn't it? We're coming." He took her hand and dragged her along with him.

"I don't care if it's polite, I want to shoot it."

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><p><em>I'm currently debating posting the next chapter this month or saving it for next month's thank you….opinions?<em>

_Again, many thanks! Please review!_


	2. Chapter 2

_Hey…so, I've got a hurricane coming, this has turned into a more than two-part thing (It got away from me. You'll see why) and I just wanted to post something of this story before I lost contact with the outside world.  
>I feel like I should title this chapter Messing With Daleks…<em>

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><p>River had been expecting to be taken to a dalek ship, or to go somewhere important. She was not expecting to be in lecture hall 3B, which existed purely to exist. Her first year at university, most professors claimed to be teaching a class there between the hours of 11:30 AM and 2:00 PM on the week days, and on the weekend they would be there from 8:00 until, quite possibly, they wound up drunk as a skunk in their bed (or someone else's).<p>

So, River decided, as a prank, (albeit costly, and time consuming) to build 3B, a small, round building on the edge of the campus. The heads of the university had considered expelling her for a little while, but then she helped form a new theory about Stonehenge and if they expelled her, it would seem rather silly. (Later, she would discover she was wrong, but she'd felt it all along.)

Currently lecture hall 3B was a student hang-out, ignored by the big wigs on campus, but occasionally searched by the police for signs of debauchery. They never found any, but they were suspicious none-the-less. River was entirely certain they would never find anything; It wasn't that she believed in the better nature of her fellow students. However, she did specialize in making certain things weren't found.

"You built this?" She heard him ask in admiration.

"Well, I planned it, and pitched in. I talked Jim and his mates into doing a lot of the work, and Diane and her mates did a lot of the decorating. Well, until the first party. They gave up after that." She shrugged.

"Who are your mates?" He asked, slipping his fingers between her fingers. It was nice, holding hands with River. Sweet.

She scoffed, "I don't have mates. I know people, is all. You're the closest I've ever had to a mate. And before you make that joke that is racing off your tongue, consider if you ever plan on even have eye contact with me again."

"Right. Yes. Ah." He paused, "Why don't you try to make friends?"

"Oh, I try." She sighed, "But it doesn't work out. There'll always be that one guy who wants to take a chance on me—besides you—but I don't do friends. Not well. I'm always 'too' something."

"Too pretty?"

"THE DOCTOR AND RIVER SONG WILL STOP FLIRTING." The dalek who was ordered to watch them said.

River pulled out her gun, "I will shoot you."

"WE FIND YOUR FLIRTING DISGUSTING."

"You are five year olds on the inside, do you know that? And so dumb." She sighed, then kissed the Doctor.

"THE DOCTOR AND RIVER SONG WILL CEASE ALL METHODS OF PROCREATION." It tried again.

"I'm going to shoot that thing." She whispered in his ear.

"Gun's going to be out of amo soon, River. Can't shoot forever." He said, "Why do you care if we…participate in procreation methods, anyway?"

The dalek froze, then responded, "IT IS NOT ALLOWED."

"A spot of kissing, not allowed?" The Doctor straightened his bowtie, "You all might be able to learn something."

"DALEKS DO NOT PROCREATE."

"Might loosen you up some if you do." River suggested.

If a Dalek could glare, the look that this one would have given River would have cut diamonds.

"THE DOCTOR AND RIVER SONG WILL CEASE TALKING." Another ordered, before getting back to its' all too important task of making certain it wasn't the one guarding the two prisoners.

River rolled her eyes, but whispered, "Sweetie, would you mind giving me your sonic?"

"It's in my front pocket, if you can reach it." He replied.

"Why can't you?"

"Well, you can do it and not look as suspicious."

She rolled her eyes, "What's that supposed to mean?"

"If I reach my hand into my coat, I will be watched closer. They may even take it away." He sighed, "If you reach into my coat, they'll only yell."

She slid her hands up his chest, "I don't like to get yelled at for something I haven't done."

"Well, if you want it— " He started, before her lips met his.

"But I don't mind getting yelled at if I've done something." She whispered in his ear as she pulled away. He barely even noticed the lightness in his pocket.

"DO NOT ATTEMPT TO PROCREATE!" The Dalek ordered.

"Oh, that wasn't attempting to procreate." River grinned, "Usually his pants are off by then."

"River, don't break the daleks pitiful, destroyed, and despicable minds." The Doctor chided, "It's a pity they don't have faces, because I would have loved to see one of theirs at a statement like that."

"You know how I told you that I talked Jim and his mates into building most of this?"

"Yeah."

"You helped me build the rest."

"Ooh, clever, clever me. What'd we build in here?" He grinned a grin that meant that if he felt free to, he would have patted future him on the back.

She winked. "Well, this, for starters."

The sonic started a high pitched whir from behind her as she pressed a button, and to the Doctor's surprise, the floor beneath them gave out. They barely heard the dalek say, "THE DOCTOR— " before the two of them were rocketed out of the room by some sort…something.

When they stopped, the Doctor discovered they were surrounded by trash, and, yes, alcohol.

"If it weren't for the fact that I currently have a soda can attached to my curls, I'd say I had fun." River sighed, "What did you think?"

"How does it work—where are we? Anyway, we built this?"

"Yes."

"Then why is there so much beer?"

"And wine. Look, we hold parties, and we need somewhere cool to keep the drinks. And trash smells. So I just sent the trash down here. I clean it out about once a week." She picked up a brush and ran it through her hair quickly before tossing it to him, "You've got either confetti or vomit in your hair. Keep the brush."

As he haphazardly ran the brush through his hair, he sighed, "I need a plan. A good plan. No shooting."

"You wound me so." She replied, "No, trust me, keep it."

He shrugged and pushed the brush into one of his pockets, "No talking, brain thinking."

"Don't you dare," She spun around and pressed her finger into his chest, "ever try to tell me what to do. I am always helping you. I will always be helping you. And I can talk if I want to, you idiot. It won't stop your brain from thinking. It never has before."

He paused, and looked at her in surprise. She gave him one last glare before turning around and storming out the door. "River!"

When he finally caught up to her, she had tears streaming down her face. "River, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to upset you."

"You'll do it again, won't you? Order me around. Tell me to be quiet, tell me that I'm not doing something right. I hate that. And yelling at you now means I can't do it again in the future. Even though it's so wrong, you doing that. It feels so awful."

"I'm sorry." He whispered.

"I probably do stuff that you don't want me doing. Or don't do stuff you expect me to do."

"I don't expect anything from you, River Song. You astound me every time I see you."

"Stop saying all the right things." She muttered, "You're so good at that, and it's so annoying. I get mad and all you do is…understand. It's…" She sighed, "Never mind."

"It's not always like this." He told her. "But come on. Spoilers. We need to figure out how to get rid of those pests."

"Right. No violence. What about dirty, underhanded tricks and implied violence?"

He sighed, "Well, actually, that sounds almost fair."

"Good." She flipped her hair, "Because I really don't want to play fair this time. What are we going to do first?"

"Let's find their ship." He grinned, "Anywhere with a good view?"

River grinned, "Well, there's always the Chancellor's Office. Come on." She took his hand and took off, her heels clicking in front of him as he jolted forward. It took only half a second for him to catch up enough to run beside her. It was exhilarating, running with River; she always knew when to run, and how fast to run. He wasn't a step ahead of her, like he was with most of the rest; she ran alongside of him and kept up, through everything. She may not be perfect; she may cause more trouble than he did in half of his regenerations; she definitely got into more trouble than he did in most of his regenerations; but she was amazing.

She sonic'd the electronic door open, and then they ran to the elevator. She knew he would have preferred to take the stairs, but the time they would have wasted running up them was vital to the subterfuge that he was obviously planning.

While they caught their breath in the elevator, he grinned, "I have an idea."

"What do you need me to do?"

"I keep forgetting that you don't ask me what I'm planning."

"Because I trust you not to get me killed."

A memory slipped before his eyes before he could stop it._"You watch us run."_ The Doctor froze and looked in her eyes, then grabbed her for a hug as the elevator door slid open.

"We have to go, Doctor! We can hug later!" She shook him off and grabbed his hand to pull him along, but he resisted, "Doctor, stuff happens. The future is the future, the past is the past. We can't change it, and no matter what happens, I wouldn't ever change it. Not for the world. Not a single word in this blue book. I don't care that in the future, mum and dad won't know who I am. I don't care that one day, you won't know. It'll hurt, but life does that. And it happens, and it keeps on going on. So let's keep going on!" She gave him another tug on the hand before letting go with a shake of her head and running forward.

He stared after her; into his past; "Not one single word." He whispered as the memory replayed.

"Doctor!" River called from down the hallway. "Doctor, now!"

His head turned to the sound of her voice; she sounded distressed. There was something in her voice that had him running before he had registered the motion of his feet. "River!"

He almost ran into the sword that blocked the doorway. His gaze followed the metal down to the hilt, up the arm of the man and finally to his face. "Rory?"

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><p><em>And there is where I lost control of the story and it started writing itself. Who liked Let's Kill Hitler? I saw through Mels and the lipstick (Attempting to keep this spoiler free-ish, for those who couldn't see it.) What about everyone else?<br>Hope everyone has good weather, where ever you are! Please drop a review!_


	3. Chapter 3

_Last chapter! Thank you to everyone who has reviewed so far, and I want to thank everyone for reading!_

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><p>Amy stood on the other side of the old sword, her arms crossed. "Doctor, you'd better have a good reason for why my daughter is searching for Dalek ships. Better yet, why don't you tell me why you decided not to call us?"<p>

He stared at the redhead, still as vibrant as when he had met her, then answered. "No time! We got here and it was all 'ahh!' then foosh, and woosh, then bang bang and running, and River was going all buzz zap with her gun and—Why are you two here?" The Doctor ran his finger lightly along the edge of the sword, then poked Rory.

"The school sent out an urgent message that our daughter's school was invaded by daleks." Rory scowled, slowly lowering the sword. He wasn't wearing the Centurion outfit; it might not have fit him now. Rory had slowly begun to gain a bit of weight here and there, and his hair was a bit balding. There were wrinkles near his eyes, and it hurt the Doctor to notice them. "And since you two were last seen sprinting out of the house, we figured that the trouble magnets were pointed straight north again."

"You are going to pay for a new set of china for me. And manually fix the damage to the garden. But no more alien plants. The last one almost ate the neighbor's dog. _And_ child." Amy gave him a hug, and dusted off his coat. "Fill us in. Why are we searching for Dalek ships?"

"We're going to destroy the entire fleet. It should be relatively simple. They're dumb enough to trick."

"You think you sound so clever." River sighed, "I'd say it's sexy, but dad's in the room."

"She's been having fun saying statements like that." The Doctor shrugged and ran a hand through his hair in an attempt to look innocent.

"Right." Rory leveled a glare at the Doctor.

The Doctor spun around to face River, "How goes the search for the ships?"

"I think that they're using a perception filter to hide it."

The Doctor gave it a cursory glance outside; "Nope."

River rolled her eyes, "What do you mean, 'nope'? Where is it then?"

"They're hiding it in plain sight." He grinned, "Pun intended. Come on!" He raced out of the room, expecting them to follow; River was already out the door with Amy at her heels. Rory put his sword away with a sigh as he ran after them.

The Doctor, in the lead this time, took them down the stairs; "Did you and Amy bring a car?"

"Yeah, why?"

"Need to drive somewhere! Take too long to walk! I'll—"

"Pay for the damage to the car." The Ponds chorused.

"No! Well, yes, but, I was going to say 'explain on the way.'" He looked back at them as he jumped down the steps and slid down the bannister part of the way.

"Yeah. Because you always explain." River rolled her eyes.

"Sooner or later." Amy added.

"Usually the latter." Rory sighed.

The Doctor frowned and made no response as he continued to run, slip and trip his way down the stairs. River slid down the banister past him, blowing him a kiss as she went by. He grinned at her, but heard Rory's cough.

They had all piled into the car when Amy and Rory started bickering.

"He said gun it, Rory!"

"The car needs time to get up to full speed!"

"You're barely touching the pedal!"

"I don't want to hit a house!"

"Find me a house out here!"

"If we let you drive, you'd find one right away."

"Shut up and speed, Rory."

Finally the Doctor said, "River, do you know why the daleks landed at your campus?"

"Because you and I were there?"

"Maybe, but probably not. How many campuses do you know that are near a large hanger?"

"Several?"

He glared at her, "Not an empty, unused one?"

"Several?"

"Oh!" Rory said, "In _plane_ sight! Was I the last one to get that?"

"Yes." Amy rolled her eyes, "Can't you drive faster? I know this car goes faster."

"Yeah. When you drive through our garage door."

"That was once."

"Twice."

"Shut up. I was going at least 90 the first time. You're only going 85."

"Because I want to make it to 85." Rory snapped back, but upped the speed anyway.

"Turn here, I think. To get to the abandoned airport?"

"Next turn." River sighed. "Left. Then we'll have to use dirt roads. Never use the front door approach, it doesn't work."

"I'll let you know it has worked for me on several occasions."

"Liar." She snorted.

"Name one time."

"Spoilers." River winked, "But we're starting to sound like mum and dad. Best stop now. Turn here, dad."

"This isn't a road, Melody. You can barely call it a path." Rory complained as he turned onto it. He sighed and fended off her argument. "I know. Doctor, how's your bank account?"

"Probably still fine. Haven't checked lately."

"Ooh, spoilers."

"Yeah," Amy rolled her eyes, "You two stop breaking my stuff. Is that it up there? Rory, take a right here!"

"Don't take a right here!" River shot back. "The next right. Then a left. Then straight. And then we walk."

"Why?" The Doctor asked, "Not that I mind. I like walking better. Less crowded. How do you humans work in—"

"Because the car isn't going to fit in the pipes. Mom, how much do you like those shoes?"

"Not much. I came prepared this time."

The Doctor had pulled out a piece of paper and started scribbling on it, despite the extreme bumpiness on the road. Once, towards end of the minute ride, he said something Amy and Rory didn't understand.

"Language!" River scolded with a laugh, "What's wrong, sweetie?"

"Rory's driving is too rough! I can't write straight at all…" He moaned, "But this ought to do, at any rate. River, where can I leave this? So that the daleks will find it?"

Rory stopped the car, and they all clamored out, "What do you want them to find?"

"This." The Doctor held it out, "You two can't read it. The TARDIS translates everything but this."

"I'll take care of this." River plucked it out of his hand, "Follow me until I say not to. Then do your stuff. I'll catch up. Oh," River said, pausing before the storm drain, "don't say anything inside this. The sound travels really, really well. It was embarrassing that one time when…Well. Spoilers, I suppose." She winked at the Doctor.

Rory opened his mouth but River ran inside the metal tube, the Doctor right next to her. Amy shook her head in unspoken resignation towards her daughter, but followed them. Rory sighed and caught up.

They were silent until they got to a fork in the drain, River motioned them down the right tube, and went down the left herself.

The Doctor shook his head, but pulled the Ponds along with him. Once they were out of the tunnel, the Doctor pulled them into a huddle, "Those ships are going to be destroyed, but we need all of the Daleks here. Hopefully, that's what River's doing, but I can't be sure."

"If River promised to do something, then she will," Amy snapped, "Some of us keep our promises."

"I never gave her that gun!"

Amy rolled her eyes, "Five minutes?"

He stared at her, his eyes dulling at the memory. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to hurt you."

"Don't insult my daughter."

"Understood."

All of the sudden loud alarms were sounding, and River pushed her way between her father and the Doctor, panting. "Almost caught me. The Daleks are coming, sweetie."

"What did you do?"

"I taped the message to an eyestalk."

"How did you get close enough to do that?"

"I'm a ninja." She replied. "Ninjas never reveal their secrets."

"That's magicians."

"Don't you wish." She winked, "So, how are we going to get them on the ships?"

"The Daleks?"

"No, dad, you and mom." River sighed, "We all need to go up into one of the four ships."

"Wha-No! That is exceedingly dangerous! Not to mention beyond stupid!"

"That's why you have the sword, Rory." Amy pecked him on the cheek, "I'm up for it."

"How am I going to protect you and Melody if we're on different ships?" He asked.

"I have my gun, dad."

"We're not actually going on the ships for long anyway. And," an alarm cut the Doctor off, and he waited until a pause, "They'll be coming now, so we shouldn't waste time arguing. Run up the ramp. On the count of NOW!" He took off running towards the farthest ship.

"Doct—" Rory started, but was cut off.

"DOCTOR."

"Run for it!" River yelled as she ran towards another one.

"Don't die on me." Amy said grabbing his hand for a second before she ran off.

"Wasn't planning on it!" he called after her, racing to get on the ship.

Once they were all on their separate ships, River called them, "Hey, it's most likely they have this number tapped, just in case—before you ask, dad, he did give them my number—so I can't talk for long—" The was a buzzing noise, "Doctor, I hope that was you blocking their signal."

"It was. So, the plan. I'll get them on the ships."

"And then?" Amy asked, sliding down another hallway.

"You three get off."

"And?" Rory asked, running down a random corridor.

"While I keep them busy, you'll help River set up the explosives."

"What?"

"Gotta go, they've found me." The buzzing noise stopped, and before the connection between all of them died River said, "I'll give the signal, okay?"

"What—" Rory tried, but the line was already dead, "For goodness sake."

When he turned down the next hallway, he realized he'd been taking a loop; a lucky, but unplanned event. He watched as all the Daleks filed on, one by one. He thought a Dalek had caught sight of him, but a screen opened up in the wall and he rolled his eyes as the Doctor started talking.

"Hello! As we speak, my friends are planting explosives inside and around your ships, and at my signal, we will blow them up."

He watched in disbelief as his daughter broke the signal and appeared, almost ghost-like, in front of the Doctor, "I like to call this a signal."

"River!"

"Sorry sweetie." Rory was already disturbed by how…sultry…Melody's winks at the Doctor were; the fact that it looked like the Doctor had her eyelashes running through his eyes didn't help any. "I'll be getting off now. You can have the spot light again."

"River—" The Doctor tried, but she was already gone. Rory didn't wait around to see what his message would be, but slide out past the Daleks, racing to meet up with his wife.

"Rory!" She grabbed his hand, "She's so smart, isn't she?"

"She's so grounded, is what she is."

"She is an adult, Rory, we can't ground her."

"I wouldn't listen anyway," River said from behind them, "I never did."

"You listened that one time, when you were ten! A bit too well, because you skipped school, do you remember that Amy?"

"Yes, she had a project due that day and I don't know who did finish it, her or the Doctor." She rolled her eyes, "We didn't have this much trouble with your siblings."

"That's because I'm a super hero." She grinned, "Who blows up buildings. Some all around the building, in case they don't leave. Here's a map, and all the explosives that you'll need. Took them off the ship." She replied as she gave Rory about fifty small battery sized capsules. "Can you take care of those? The Doctor's going to play fair no matter what, and I don't want him to get killed before I meet him."

"What are you going to do?"

She turned back to face her mother, "Spoilers, mum. I'll see you two soon. Be safe!"

"You too!" Amy called, taking the map and pulling Rory after her, whispering, "She's an adult Rory. And this will help the Doctor, and keep her safe, okay? Because he'll keep her safe. Always. And he knows her better than we do. Don't turn back, you're holding highly explosive…batteries."

"Why do we always end up in these situations?"

"Because we're with the Doctor."

River smiled as she caught the last words of her parents. She turned back around and the Doctor ran into her. He was being followed by about twenty Daleks. She rolled her eyes and systematically began to shoot them, one by one, enough to scare them back on to the ships.

"What are you doing? We've got to go! Where are the explosives?"

"Most of them are with Amy and Rory. They're planting them outside the buildings."

"When will they explode?" He asked, grabbing her hand and pulling her forward. "Most?"

"I kept some. In case."

"In case of what?"

"In case." She smiled widely; "Plus, if I don't have to use them, then I can save them. Ooh, I just might save some. That could be so much fun."

"Stop it." He muttered, with a half a smile.

"Make me."

"I really shouldn't like you this much when you say stuff like that."

"Oh, but you really should." She winked.

"AMY! RORY!" The Doctor bellowed, at her parents as ran towards them, "THIS WAY!"

"Why? We've still got theses—"

"Toss them behind us! And _run,_ Ponds! Can't you take instructions?" He yelled as he heard them stop.

"Shut up, Doctor!" Amy yelled at him as she helped Rory chuck the bombs behind them, towards the abandoned building.

"What are you doing?"

"Rory stumbled and they activated as he was holding them! I don't know about you two, but I don't want to get blown up!"

"Rory!" The Doctor sighed, "At least it's not the couplings this time."

"That is not why I stumbled—"

"Doesn't matter! Run!" River shouted as the first of the bombs started to explode, destroying the building in a rather spectacular manner, if the Doctor had been allowed to comment. Amy felt it was really loud, Rory would have gone for 'explosive' and River would have said that she 'had seen better. Spoilers!'

"Doctor…" Rory shouted, and then continued, "How likely is it that the car survived the back draft from that?"

"Well, it depends on your definition of 'survived'!"

"In one piece."

"Does melted together count?"

"Doctor!"

"I'll pay for it!"

"Ooh, we should get a Ferrari this time." River grinned, "Always wanted one."

"No. We'll get something sensible. That we don't like, because I'm sure you two will destroy that one, am I right?" Rory rolled his eyes.

"Spoilers!"

"That always means yes." Amy sighed. "Just get us a clunker this time."

"I know just the thing. It's a replica from Gamma Six, wonderful on gas. It converts gas fumes into gas so that you don't need to buy gas more than once." He told them excitedly as they reached the TARDIS.

"A replica of what?" Amy asked, opening the door with her key.

"Can't remember. Actually, it may not run off of gas, can't remember. Maybe Uranium? Anyway, it's good for the environment."

"No. We need a car from 21st century Earth, Doctor." Rory sighed, "More pressing question, though. Why is the TARDIS in the middle of nowhere?"

"Ask your daughter. She flew it out here."

"Spoilers." River winked after spinning around the TARDIS console, turning directing it to her parents' home with the Doctor's help. "I'll tell you two all about it later. Go take care of my little sister though. She's going to be worrying when she gets home."

"She so her father's daughter." Amy pecked Rory on the cheek. "Though I'd love to hear which one of you taught her to punch like she does, because I've got to ground her when she gets home. Again."

Rory raised his hand cautiously, "It was to protect her from unwanted advances."

Amy sighed and shook her head,"Well, you certainly didn't teach her to kick!"

The Doctor's head popped around the console. "That was the Rockettes."

"When did you take my daughter to see the Rockettes?"

"1980, maybe. 2080?"

"No." Amy frowned, "Not when did she see them. When did you take her?"

"When we babysat her, the week before Christmas and you and Rory had to go take care of some old sick relative? Why do your relatives get sick at Christmas time? Horrible time to get sick."

"Melody babysat her."

"Maybe I invited him over for a day. That's no crime." She shot a look over at the Doctor, who pretended to ignore her.

"You two took your eleven year old sister to a Rockettes contest." Rory said, flatly. He frowned, but couldn't think of anything else to say.

"Not really. We took her to see the Macy's Thanksgiving Parade. And then we ran into the Rockettes. There was a bit of trouble, and they offered to watch her while we got rid of the aliens." The Doctor grinned, "You should have seen them, Amy. You would have loved them. Big and green. With teeth. Ooh, their teeth. And Rory, they had these suits, brilliant suits—"

"We're back!" River pushed her parents towards the door. "See you two in a few hours. I'll drive the car over, and then get back to campus. Okay? I'll bring a new china set too. And get someone to properly replant and fix the garden. Bye! Love you two!" She gave them one last push out the door, and then locked it. "Big and green with teeth? You know how protective of her they are!"

"Yes, well." He grinned and kissed her on the forehead, "I believe we were getting you a new dress? I used to hate doing this, even with your Mum."

"She never looked to see how well her guns were hidden by the dress." River commented.

He grinned, but then pretended to frown in disapproval, and changed the direction of the conversation "You look for pockets! Dresses with pockets, those are so cool."

"Cooler than bowties?" River smiled, and watched as he started to pilot the TARDIS.

"Close." He turned to look at her, "Dress shopping, and then?" he left the question hanging in the air, waiting for her response.

"Next stop anywhere."

* * *

><p><em>Auugghh sappy ending! Didn't see that one coming! Thank you for reading this story, and please drop a review!<em>


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